**Repost of a blog from September 22, 2007**
God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.
I have found myself saying that prayer to myself over and over again lately. Certain events have caused me to reconsider my current situation, in particular, my friendships. Or lack there of.
Now don't get me wrong, I cherish the friends that I have. The friends I have in my life are the genuine article. Top quality. They have helped me through some tough times and, even when I have screwed up in the past…and I mean major screw ups, they are still there. Trying to offer advice or trying to make me crack a smile. But the feeling is mutual. I will gladly empty my bank account if one of them needs help. Or a shoulder to cry on. Or my flat booty to crack jokes on…lol!
Recently, I have lost touch with several friends of mine and have done nothing about it. Actually, "recently" is not the best phrase to use because some of them I haven't talked to in months…. or years! I know, I know, that is horrible. And why have I done this? Who knows
Sheer laziness. Sheer selfishness.
Sometimes, I just didn't feel like talking but they are the kind of people that, if you tell them that, they will understand. But still, I do nothing to change this fact.
I have to make some changes in my daily life and do better.
God grant me…the courage to change the things I can…
Even more recently, I have lost touch with a friend. I know in the past that I have used my blogs to kind of put people on blast but I won't do it this time. What's the point?
Now the reason behind us not talking anymore…well, it was the influence of others…by that I mean their words and actions.
Evil people always seem to find a way to ruin a good thing. Always. Whether they are jealous, scared, lonely, or insecure about themselves. They can't stand to see people doing better than themselves. Sometimes they hate just because they envy what you have.
How about this people…grow up! If you aren't getting what you want, so what? That is your issue to deal with. Don't bring your rainy cloud over my parade!
Get a life and stop envying mine.
God grant me the serenity to accept the things(...and people) I cannot change...
Now I have let go of some friends in the past that have not meant that much too me. Or because their true colors and intentions become very apparent. When that was the case, I dismissed them. Erased their numbers, cussed a few out, and moved on with life.
But the good ones, whether good on the surface or deep down, you do your hardest to hold on to. Because they are the pearls. You can't find people like that everyday. So when you lose one, it hurts. And even though we (this particular friend and I) don't have years and years of history, losing any friend hurts.
Especially those that matter.
Others might not see your worth but I do. And that is what matters.
People question why I even care about losing a friend. What should it matter? Well, when it comes down to it, I do care. When you get to the point that you care about a friend and their well-being…and would help them out without a second thought, they are a keeper.
God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.
So for any of my friends I haven't talked to in a while, I promise I will get back in touch. I promise.
And for my recent loss, well, we will see what happens.
I hope things get better for you...for me...for everyone.
That's all. Goodnight.
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