Sunday, March 7, 2010

We're In This Together...

Having a reflective moment, bare with me.

In life, we surround ourselves with people that reflect our own interests and goals. Our styles and hopes and even our sense of humors. You always have to keep people around that get the joke. Anyway, if this is true in social situations, it must apply in love too. We are attracted to like-minded people. Sometimes their faults reflect our own faults. We meet people on the same levels as us. But that is what you want. You want someone that understands where you have been and where you want to go. You want someone that is on the same path, though not necessarily the same goal.

That being said, when one of you is moving along faster than the other, what do you do? Do you slow your pace so they can catch up? Do you keep going without them? What is the right course of action? I wish I knew the answer to that. A definitive answer.

Here is what my heart tells me. If you are with someone that is like you, maybe their struggles are a reflection of your own. Maybe your success is one area is a reflect of your failure in another. Just because you both aren't moving at the same pace doesn't mean you give up on them. I can look down on you and tell you to get your shit together only when I am at a point of true success. I just because I have a good paying job isn't a complete success if I hate it. That keeps money in the bank but not happiness in my life. I don't have the headaches of the single mothers and fathers but I don't have the joy of having a child either.

Don't get me wrong, I am grateful for my successes and triumphs. I have great accomplishments but there is always room for improvement. I know I am a work in progress. There is always an upgrade of me available. But getting there is always a struggle. You can always see the best in yourself but it is sometimes hard to get others too. And that is when you need to find someone that does. I think I always taken a liking to someone that is on their way to greatness but not quite there yet.

I have gone through some extremes too. I have had a man with no ambition and a man that was so ambitious he thought I wasn't good enough to be on his level anymore. Hell, I have had a man that didn't know what was good for him at all. Just lost in life.

But the man that knows what he wants and is working to get there, I have respect for. One that doesn't look down on me for holding him back and that I don't have to push to just to get him going. He knows where he wants to be and thought he struggles to get there, makes small successes and tries to make it happen. Ambitious but not pompous. Making a way but not standing still. He doesn't like being a failure and finds a way to make things work. He might now find all his successes at the same time but he will eventually. Eventually he will be completely happy but, for now, finds happiness in what he has accomplished so far and in life.

I think I lost my point along the way. Oh well. I think I just needed to say that. Take what you will from it. I hope it made sense.